National Punctuation Day

In honor of National Punctuation Day, I have composed this poem about my favorite punctuation mark and why it stands so high above the rest. I hope you enjoy it.

Dashed Hopes – A Poem of Love for Punctuation

When considering how to get the point
across through pen and prose,
function must oft' follow form
as punctuation goes.

The comma, while a friend of mine,
conveys too many things.
It ends a thought, takes a breath,
or connects a list like string.

A period can stand alone.
The dot will never flee.
It completes a sentence
long or short with authority.

Colons: full and semi both;
they have their place and time.
But neither helps me half as much
when working with a rhyme.

Exclamation point! Question mark?
Can anyone do without them?
They help! But when overused
will an editor dare not strike them?

Of all the punctuation, dots to lines,
in my grammar toolbox,
the dash – that noble stroke of pen –
is the favorite of this lummox.

The dash does more than I can tell
for fear I get too analytical –
it cuts, it binds, it separates
my thoughts so parenthetical.

When periods, commas, or other marks
don't quite cut the muster
The dash – the dash! – has more to give
and ne'er shall lose its luster.

NBC's Merlin is Smallville in Camelot

Maybe the summer heat is making me grumpy. Or maybe it's NBC's fault for saving their worst shows for summer. After laughing my way through the first couple of episodes of its EMT-telepath drama The Listener, I was hoping for something better from Sunday's two-episode premiere of Merlin.

From the opening scene of the show, I sensed something amiss. The backdrops looked a little too painted. The characters were a bit too diversified for England, circa A.D. 1100. Like many of the made-for-television fantasy films on the SCI FI channel, the NBC drama Merlin seems to disregard historical accuracy. I understand that there's a "fantasy" element to Camelot, but when the lead character (played by Colin Morgan) is wearing clothes that look modern enough to blend in at the local mall, it's difficult to take the story seriously.

And then there's the story. This isn't the traditional telling of King Arthur's Knights of the Round Table. It's about a young Merlin meeting a young Arthur, before fame and glory. If the story seems slightly familiar -- if there's something that you can't quite put your finger on -- let me spell it out for you: Smallville.

Yes, the makers of Merlin have co-opted the CW's long-running "Superman as a teen" series Smallville. Only the names have been changed to protect the writers from copyright infringement.

In Merlin, we have a character with amazing powers that he must keep secret (think Clark Kent) who meets up with a rich and powerful king's son (think Lex Luthor). The king (think Lionel Luthor) is evil, but his son could go either way. The difference here is that they begin as enemies and will end as allies, whereas Clark Kent and Lex Luthor went the opposite way.

Every week, it appears that Merlin must save Arthur from others who possess magic, while keeping his own magic powers a secret. This is the same "meteor freak of the week" formula that launched Smallville.

Guiding Merlin is a wise dragon hidden beneath the castle (think Clark Kent getting advice from Jor-El in his Fortress of Solitude). And then there are the ladies. The lovely Morgana (Lana Lang?) is out of Merlin's reach, but he has a buddy in Morgana's maid servant, Guinevere (Chloe Sullivan).

If that's not enough to convince anyone, I would also point out the blue shirt with red bandanna that Merlin wears reflect the color combination that Clark Kent favors and Superman made famous.

Although I once loved Smallville (until season 3 or so), I see no reason to believe that Merlin has anything new or interesting to offer. This seems a poor attempt to cash in on the fantasy genre while mashing it with modern television storytelling aimed at a youth demographic.

It's Teen Camelot, and I don't think anyone really needs that.

Are Pixar movies gender biased?

Earlier this month, NPR's Linda Holmes wrote an open letter to Pixar ("Dear Pixar, From All The Girls With Band-Aids On Their Knees") beseeching them to create a film for girls. News of this has generated a flood of positive and negative responses. And while I am not one to get swept up in the politics of these arguments, I would like to give my thoughts.

Maybe I have been blinded by the beauty of Walt Disney and Pixar films over the years. But not once have I stopped to question whether a film could be better served by making a leading role a female character instead of a male (or vice versa).

Finding Nemo was not a story about a father looking for his son, but rather a parent looking for a missing child. Toy Story was not about two "boy" toys, it was about all toys. Wall-E and Eve had a male/female dynamic, but they were (in fact) robots first.

And as for Up, it was about love and adventure. Even though Ellie isn't in much of the movie, her soul is the entire movie. In hindsight, I don't think the film would have worked any other way.

As a writer, I have been told over and over to write what I know. It is clear that the writers at Pixar know and understand children. They see the world through those eyes. If the writers of Finding Nemo or Up couched their stories in male terms, perhaps that is an unintentional bias. I am fairly certain that they are writing what they know, as former boys and dads.

I have no idea what Pixar does to solicit scripts or how many women are on its staff. Maybe they need to hire more women writers to develop concepts. Maybe they already have several who are striving to get their scripts accepted. I don't pretend to know.

But asking a writer to change a character from male to female for the sake of some arbitrary -- but well-intentioned -- mandate is just sad. Creativity should come from the soul, not a marketing focus group.

Don't ask Pixar to change its creative process. So far, the company has a perfect record making films that children and adults (boys and girls) love to see.